Love. People write songs about it, kill for it, and we are all looking for it.
It has been proven that love is the ultimate DRUG. The brain floods with dopamine, creating a reward response. We feel elated and invincible. A similar high to cocaine or nicotine.
When the relationship is over, another response hits us, fight or flight. This response inhibits our ability to rationally or reasonably think, leaving us feeling anxious.
On a primitive level, we avoid pain, seeking out pleasure; this alone can be the band-aid that keeps us coming back for more. The roller coaster ride becomes an addiction that we cannot get off of, soon we don’t even understand our own choices.
When the ashes have settled, and the relationship does end, our most popular cures of sex, drugs, and rock and roll, will only increase this anxiety. To actually step off the roller coaster for good, we have to focus on self-care and give it good ol’ fashion time.
The usual suspects, exercise, eating right, and self-improvement need to be implemented. Early morning exercise & smoothies. Spend weekends making yourself breakfast, and investing time into yourself.
It is easy to spiral into self-pity, blame, and hate. Keep in mind this is partially due to a chemical response. A break up may feel like the end of your world, but it is just the end of a chapter.
Relationships are learning lessons. A person comes into our life and reflects back at us, the things we might not want to see. Each relationship makes us a better version of ourself. The ending of a relationship does not mean anything other than two people have grown in different ways.
Know that you were ok before this relationship, and you will be ok after it too. Be gentle on yourself. Feel what you have to feel, talk it out with the people you love, and know that this won’t last forever.
What is your break-up cure?