I had a few hours on my own, so I figured what better to do than find myself a cute new postpartum dress. I popped into my fav department store, for a quick looksie.
Instead of finding the perfect dress, I stumbled upon a rather unfortunate situation.
This cutie little girl (maybe) seven years old, was holding a pair of ladies jeans. She marched over to her mother and said, “Look ma, these jeans are a size two, and the legs are SO long… No one is going to fit in these pants!” I wasn’t sure if I should be impressed or concerned that a seven year old knows what a size two is…
Her mother who was focused on swiping through the rack of shirts, looked up and replied, “Actually lovie, those pants DO fit some women… and that is just UNFAIR!” The little girl processed and repeated, “Yeah, that is UNFAIR!” Her mother continued, “But not us girls, we will never fit those pants… and you know what that is?!” The little girl looked again at the pants and said, “Unfair”.
“Another one bites the dust…” I thought to myself.
I actually contemplated going over there and saying something to the mother. But I figured the potential risk of being told off wasn’t really how I wanted my relaxing afternoon to go.
Mothers please, I BEG YOU: STOP and THINK about the messages you are spreading to your young child.
THESE IDEAS ABOUT THE BODY ONLY HAVE POWER IF WE SPREAD THEM, AND MAKE THEM REAL!
I didn’t pick my body. You didn’t pick yours. Why do we give something we have no control over SO MUCH power?!
We can blame the media until the cows come home. But the media did NOT tell that seven year old that her body, or the fact she would never fit into a pair of pants, was “unfair”. Her mother did.
After 13 years in the fashion industry, I understand very well the power of media images. We are in a beautiful time that is promoting body positivity of all shapes and sizes. We all have to work together to make this movement a reality. This starts with how you see yourself.
Everyone feels unattractive sometimes. Everyone feels heavy sometimes. Everyone suffers from insecurities. Everyone wants something they do not have. We don’t all get dealt the same cards in life, but ‘winning’ is about how you play your cards.
There will always be someone “richer, hotter, smarter, faster, stronger”, and there will always be someone that lacks every single one of those things. But that is someone else and their own life. You should only care about your own life. So instead of thinking life is unfair, use that fuel to create a better life for yourself.
Don’t hold up a pair of pants and let it define you or the person that might wear ’em. As long as we give those concepts power, the influence will rob us of being content with ourselves.
The reality is even if these notions hold truth, we have to decide if that resonates with us. There are many beliefs in this world, and we get to decide if said belief fits into our life.