To Honour The Self Manifesto

Don’t YOU LOVE when you read something that SPEAKS TO YOU.  It is like the perfect candy, or flirty smile from someone you fancy, or a compliment…  It is satisfying, makes you feel alive, like you’ve solved a puzzle.

To Honour The Self is my kind of language.

To honour the self is to be willing to think independently, to live by our own mind, and to have the courage of our own perceptions of judgments.
To honour the self is to be willing to know not only what we think, but also what we feel, what we want, need, desire, suffer over, are frightened or angered by–and to accept our right to experience such feelings. The opposite of this attitude is denial, disowning, repression–self-repudiation.
To honour the self is to preserve an attitude of self-acceptance–which means to accept what we are, without self-oppression or self-castigation; without any pretense about the truth of our own being, pretense aimed at deceiving either ourselves or anyone else.
To honour the self is to live authentically, to speak and act from our innermost convictions and feelings.
To honour the self is to refuse to accept unearned guilt, and to do our best to correct such guilt as we may have earned.
To honour the self is to be committed to our right to exist which proceeds from the knowledge that our life does not belong to others and that we are not here on earth to live up to someone else’s expectations. To many people this is a terrifying responsibility.
To honour the self is to be in love with our own life, in love with our possibilities for growth and for experiencing joy, in love with the process of discovery and exploring our distinctively human potentialities.
Thus we can begin to see that to honour the self is to practice selfishness in the highest, noblest, and least understood sense of that word. And this, I shall argue, requires enormous independence, courage, and integrity.
We need to love ourselves and make a commitment to ourselves. We need to give ourselves some of the boundless loyalty that we are willing to give others. Out of high self-esteem will come true acts of kindness and charity, not selfishness. The love we give and receive will be enhanced by the love we give ourselves.

Honouring The Self: Self-Esteem and Personal Transformation by Nathaniel Branden

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